11 Things NOT To Do In Medellin
Don’t do these 11 things. They will optimize your safety & happiness while in Medellin.
By Kaveh Paymayesh
Here’s a list of 11 things not to do in Medellin. With over 7 years of experience, you don’t have to learn the hard way as I did.
1. Don't slam car doors
In the UK, we have a tendency to shut car doors, hard! Make sure you don’t do that in Medellin.
This applies mainly to taxis as they are the most common vehicle boarded by foreigners. Speaking of which, you’ll find taxis in many different shapes and conditions. While some may look worse for wear, do NOT slam that bloody door.
Yes, I have seen emotional outbursts from taxistas (taxi drivers) after a friend has shut the door too hard. They really don’t like it!
Even if you don’t get scolded for it, you’re likely to have upset your driver. Many of whom are cool, honest people. Don’t make things awkward, lol. Paisas are awesome by nature so make sure to observe their formalities beforehand.
Anyhow, why do Paisas oppose door slamming so much? We do it elsewhere, right?
Repeated slamming can result in increased wear on the latching mechanisms, hinges and rubber strip around the door. Besides, have you seen Colombian taxis?
Gotta be careful with those fragile things.
Remember:
Taxistas depend on those cars for their livelihood.
In case you didn’t know, taxi driving is far from a prosperous career option in Medellin, with many barely making ends meet. Right now inflation is hammering Colombia; things are expensive and capital for a new car is a luxury.
Sustainability is the name of the game. That’s why you’ll see many old, banged-up taxis everywhere.
2. Don't flex, don't display your wealth
Don’t flash! The majority of Medellin’s visitors come from the USA – a known individualist society. In such a culture, its normal to flaunt what you got (or don’t).
This is a BIG no-no in Medellin. Affluent Colombians try to make themselves less vulnerable, where possible. They avoid certain areas of the city, dress inconspicuously, and spend less time on foot.
Remember that the thieves are always one step ahead. They target affluent areas because they know what’s up. This is why El Poblado & Laureles – the two most affluent sectors of the city – experience the highest volume of robberies.
What is the point in talking about your wealth when the average monthly income in the most affluent neighbourhood (Poblado) is $1,000? There’s no need to flex, leave that all behind. Nobody wants to know how many thousands you earn each month. It’ll only make you a target.
Sadly, events like this do occur in Medellin – that is why it is important to implement the right measures & mindset.
Watches, chains, flashy clothes – they are not worth wearing in public unless you are willing to lose them.
Do not carry what you’re not willing to lose. Items that you’re not willing to lose are items that you are willing to die for…
Keep them safe at home.
3. Dress the part; no flip-flops
This isn’t essential, but still advised. Gringos are encouraged to dress locally to avoid standing out.
My opinion is that as a gringo, you’ll stand out regardless. If you’re blonde, 6ft and English speaking, good luck trying to blend in! There are exceptions; Paisas have strong European/Middle Eastern lineage.
Any crook that is somewhat competent at their craft is going to be able to sniff you out.
Here’s the thing – dressing like a local demonstrates that you are versed in the culture. You therefore become less of a target than somebody in their flip-flips who looks like they just arrived.
Dressing like a local = trousers (unless it is Sunday), a nice shirt. Don’t expose your feet and toes! No tank-tops on the streets. Exceptions may apply.
Learn some of the lingo and make sure to dress the part if you want to be less conspicuous.
Again – dressing like a gringo doesn’t equate to danger. It may, however, make you feel less comfortable in certain districts such as El Centro. People in these areas tend to dress more conservatively than in more gentrified areas such as Poblado.
Finally, dressing properly is important when trying to wow the locals. Flip-flops aren’t going to turn anybody on.
4. Do not use street ATMS (cajeros)
In Medellin, ATMs are abundant throughout streets and malls. Some are semi concealed within a booth, giving a greater sense of security for those using them.
Alas, I do not recommend that noobies get too comfortable with using these street cajeros.
If your safety is imperative then you should instead withdraw money from malls. Even more, you should linger a bit before leaving for the streets.
Following these tips will reduce your chances of predation. You may think that the above tips are OTT – you may have withdrawn money from the street 100s of times without problem.
It’s a question of odds though, and I personally like to keep mine down as much as possible. These are odds that YOU can control.
5. Minimize talk of Pablo Escobar
Are there any topics more polarizing to Colombians, especially Paisas, than Pablo Escobar?
Yes, there may be some Paisas that like him, especially those that benefited from his strategy to polarize the city. In his early days, he fancied himself as the Robin Hood of Colombia. Escobar’s true colours came to light though when he was cornered by the government and opposing drug factions. In an attempt to retract any expedition to the USA, Escobar waged an indiscriminate war on his country, killing over 4,000 innocent Colombians.
When push came to shove, he didn’t care who was killed.
Pablo’s actions continue to reverberate in Medellin. Many of the city’s pretty streets today had been the scenes of heinous violence less than 35 years ago. Many civilians know somebody killed or damaged by this war.
Please be conscious of this and don’t be impudent. There are Pablo tours – but only because there is money to be made in them.
I’m not saying you should avoid conversation about him altogether, everybody has an opinion and it’s inevitable that he will come up during talk at some point.
I’m just saying that he is a very polarizing figure and it would be kind of like talking to New Yorkers about 9/11. People suffered, so it’s a delicate topic.
Finally, much of Medellin’s impetus to become what it is today was driven by the city’s ambitions to remove itself from that legacy. If Pablo still had his way, I doubt you or I would want to come to Medellin.
6. Don't take your phone out in the streets TOO often
You’ve probably been warned not to expose your phone in public whilst visiting Medellin. You may then be surprised when seeing that people generally don’t seem to heed this advice.
You’ll find people using phones everywhere: on the metro, on the streets, in parks.
Heck, all parks in the city provide free WIFI, thus encouraging the public to use their electronic devices overtly and without fear.
We need our phones for a variety of reasons so it isn’t very practical advice to hide your phone at all times.
Again, this all comes down to risk exposure. Having your phone on display doesn’t mean that you’ll get robbed – far from it. It does however increase your chances. It’s down to you to determine that golden balance.
Always be conscious of where and when you’re pulling out your phone. Get into the habit of checking your six. Always scan the local environment and remain vigilant.
I would advise you to use your phone only when its imperative, e.g., to check where your Uber is.
Don’t stroll around with your head glued to your screen, scrolling through socials. That is risky business.
In the video below, observe how the victim was giving papaya. His eyes were glued to his phone and robbers took advantage in a matter of seconds.
7. Don't walk alone at night/avoid quiet areas
Unless you’re in a populated area, walking around at night increases your chances of being victimized.
It’s not the darkness you want to avoid, but the solitude that regularly comes with it. Some streets that are busy during the day become desolate once the sun sets.
Walking down quiet roads isn’t a death sentence. You can do so and will probably be fine. You are increasing your odds though. It’s all about your aversion to risk. Reduce your odds by not singling yourself out in quiet streets, even during the day.
Remember, you’re more likely to run into trouble on a quiet street in the day than a busy one during the night.
And you’ll know when you’re giving papaya (exposing yourself to risk). Some roads feel cold and creepy. Have you seen Lord of The Rings where the hobbits sense the presence of danger lurking?
“Get off the road!”
Lack of lighting, people, noise, activity = these spell trouble.
For more information, I have a more in-depth article on safety here.
8. Don't get overexcited on Tinder
We all know that Medellin is home to beautiful women. In Europe & North America, dating apps such as Tinder are the quickest and most effective way to get laid.
It’s not hard to see why so many foreigners are therefore jumping on these apps when coming to Medellin.
I would not advise this though. Get to know the lay of the land beforehand.
Dating apps are not popular in Colombia. Tinder is frequented by prostitutes & nefarious characters. Druggings are common!
Horny men are vulnerable men. Horny, CLUELESS men, however, are ripe for the picking.
I recommend that you sift through Facebook groups to see how regular these druggings are. There is even a Fb group dedicated to victims of scopolamine.
For those that don’t know, scopolamine is a nightmare drug that completely subdues its victims. You’ll be completely suggestible and comply with the malignant demands of your captor. Tinder has become a common means by which foreigners expose themselves to this nefarious drug.
Tinder can be extremely rewarding in Medellin but you must know how to navigate it. I have a detailed Tinder guide on what to look out for and how to stay safe.
9. Don't be confrontational
Paisas generally tend to avoid confrontation. More so than back home at least.
Why?
You never know who you’re dealing with and so it’s best to ‘err on the side of caution’. I’ve seen harrowing CCTV footage of a fit, athletic Paisa bleeding out on the street after two skinny punks repeatedly stabbed him in the neck. All because of a petty confrontation; pure nonsense. Life can be cheap here in Colombia.
Even well-dressed individuals that look unsuspecting and friendly – you should never underestimate what they’re capable of. Some of Medellin’s most dangerous individuals are the least conspicuous. The high-up career criminals are often well-groomed, which makes them even more unsettling.
Here’s an example below: the video shows the capture of an infamous narcotrafficker going by the name of Pichi. He was arrested in a ritzy part of Envigado. Notice how well-dressed and normal the man appears. He ordered the deaths of scores of people. A true nutter capable of committing atrocities, something that you’d never know until it is too late.
As I always say: observe the culture. People here are friendly, even the bad guys. Don’t put yourself in danger by acting out as the big man. For many, life is cheap.
10. Don't forget to bring your PATIENCE
Time is not a commodity in Colombia – get used to it.
Whether you’re at a shop checkout, looking for property or making plans, never forget to bring your patience. You’ll otherwise suffer and wear yourself out.
Waiting sucks. In the US, everything is streamlined for maximum efficiency. It’s a luxury that we take for granted.
Have the right expectations before hand, appreciate that this is part of the package of living in an awesome place like Medellin, and learn to roll with it. That’s my best advice. You can try to fight it but you’ll probably end up resenting the place.
11. Don't forget to bring your gadgets
In Medellin, electronic devices are hit with hefty import taxes. This makes them not elusive but costly too.
For this reason, it is habitual for foreigners to ask other inbound travellers to bring with them things that they need. This is a common sight amongst FB groups.
Also, don’t take Amazon Prime for granted, as it isn’t available in Medellin.
With that in mind, you should try to bring all your necessary devices & electronics with you.
Monterrey is a mall in El Poblado that specializes in the sale of electronic devices, but there is no guarantee you’ll find what you need. If you do, expect to pay more than what you would back home.
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